“Well one of us must have killed him!”
Hey, it wasn’t me. Yeah, I run a ‘Social Club’ for men seeking the company of a young lady for the night (I’m not called Miss Scarlet for nothing), but it’s not like it’s a secret. Hell, half the senators and congressmen in Washington have a running tab! Maybe Mr. Boddy was blackmailing me, but those politicians have a lot more to lose than me; there’s no way I’d need him dead.
I didn’t do it, there wasn’t any point. I know a professor isn’t supposed to sleep with subjects, but I’m just a man (by the way, Scarlet, can I get your number?) I was paying off Mr. Boddy, it’s true, but it wasn’t life or death. Anyway, it’s not like I’m the first guy to slip, and it wouldn’t bother my colleagues at UNO WHO (United Nations Organization, World Health Organization, in case you wondered) … hell, I might go up on their estimation!
It certainly wasn’t me. Perhaps I have had a husband or two; and perhaps our marriages met their ends in unusual ways, but it wasn’t my fault. Men are so unreliable. Dr. White (my last husband) was a scientist; his death wasn’t a complete surprise, he was mixed up with some sort of top secret project. Some might say a violent death was unavoidable! But Mr. Boddy blackmailed me anyway- you’d think an accusation of murder and dismemberment would have made him a bit wary… like I said, though, I didn’t kill him!
Don’t look at me! I was an army colonel during the war, but that doesn’t make me a violent man. I don’t know how Mr. Boddy found out I was a profiteer, but he took everything I made and more- wiped me out. If I was going to kill him, wouldn’t I have done it before now? Obviously I’m too much of a coward to do anything! My nerves can’t take this…
How dare you even think of accusing me! I am the wife of Senator Peacock, a pillar of our community and a powerful figure in society. Mr. Boddys claim was preposterous- why would I accept bribes in some dirty mens’ room? (it wasn’t that dirty!) There’s nothing wrong with receiving consultation fees, and that’s all they were. So you see? I had no reason to kill him!
Well I didn’t do it! I hold a very sensitive post in a certain government agency… I can’t really talk about that. But I was very up front about the reason I was paying Mr. Boddy; when Wadsworth was reviewing the guests, I stood up and introduced myself, I told you the reason I was there… I’m an innocent man, ask anyone they’ll say Mr. Green is a good guy! I didn’t do it!
I’m afraid this whole dinner has gotten well out of hand; as Mr. Boddys butler I like things… tidy. Then again, the messy issue of blackmail has been cleared up; so I suppose it’s all neat now. Would anyone like a brandy, cigar?